don’t tell me I’m your everything

Don’t tell me I’m your everything,
your universe, your all,
don’t place me on a pedestal
from which I’ll surely fall.
Your happiness is not
my responsibility,
even if I wanted to
I can’t meet all your needs.
I will not be your mother,
feeding up your fears,
nor will I be your Mrs
<insert husband’s name here>
I’ll sign my name to what I write –
if you’ll just let go my hand –
and though I walk beside you
on my own two feet I’ll stand.
At times I’ll lean on you,
at times you’ll lean on me,
at times there’ll be accord,
at times we’ll disagree.
But don’t avoid the eggshells
by climbing on my back,
if you want to walk beside me
along life’s winding track.


I was listening to one of those songs in the car recently that goes along the lines of “you’re all I want, you’re all I need, you’re everything… oooohhhh…… ooooh…”, and while I quite like the song it occurred to me that that’s a hell of a burden to place on another human being – to be everything to someone else. What an outrageous responsibility – like being a parent, but with no hope of the child growing up (unless they shift the creepy obsession to someone else). It’s also pretty risky (and probably unhealthy) for the person making that claim. Call me cynical (you wouldn’t be the first) but I think that sort of dependency is unlikely to end well. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating polygamy (nor am I condemning it), but if there is only one person providing all your emotional needs, that’s risky. There’s a reason very few buildings have a single support. Stability requires a strong foundation, and some redundancy in supports helps a lot during earthquakes. More supports also mean less pressure on any given support, less likelihood that you collapse a support, and less likelihood of a catastrophic collapse if any one support does fail. It’s just responsible engineering to spread the load…   


Filed under musings, poem

6 responses to “don’t tell me I’m your everything

  1. I think you got it right! Loved this poem.

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